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| good times! |
[Friday
05 30 08 | 02:47am] |
Well..
Its been forever and a day, I know no one really uses this as much as we used to before myspace and facebook came around, but i wanted to update those who actually do read this on my life as of late.
I looked back on previous entries. so depressed, annoyed, bored with life. Yeah, im still some of those, but by far not to the extent as before.
Im happy!
Lets see, since the last update Ive done a few things.
I started working at the bar, Ive made pretty damn good money there, although all of it went to chuck everynight, i finally have him out of the apartment, yeah i still owe him a little bit, but by far not what it was a month ago.
I went to Chicago. Jo and I left at the beginning of May, staying with Scott and Lisa. I really missed them..a lot. It seems everytime I go there, I lose track of reality, time and worry. I love it. We only stayed for 3 days, and I was sick the entire trip, but definately took advantage of the vacation. Ill be back soon, thats for sure.
Started my math class. At first i was freaking out, I havent taken math since....Miss Burcham's integrated 1 class. my sophomore year of high school. Im getting a B+ thus far... not bad.
Im taking the musical theatre intensive course this summer with Michael Barnes. So excited for that, Im not sure what we are doing, but im taking every bit of knowledge i can get from this.
Speaking of theatre, I got cast as the lead in Reefer Madness the Musical. This has got to be one of the most fun shows Ive been in, and its cast is pretty damn good too..and most are my friends.haha. Come see me as Jimmy Harper in July and August.!!! Ill send out more info as the date gets sooner.
Im moving...yes..again.. Back to the renaud in a 1 BR with Jo. on the 4th floor. Its going to be pretty exciting, and by the sounds of it, its going to look really nice. Im super excited for it. Saturday is the big day.
I've finally found someone that I might like..and its making me really happy again.
I love my cat, even though he pooped on my carpet this morning! =)
I love life right now..just need a few 100 dollars and Im back to normal again!
YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
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[Thursday
02 21 08 | 01:43am] |
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im sad.
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[Thursday
02 14 08 | 01:44am] |
im feeling a bit better now.
just need a few arrangements.
i need to figure my life after college out soon!
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[Sunday
01 27 08 | 02:44am] |
i need ambition
i need inspiration
i need drive
i need goals
i need money
i need life.
i need a new job
i need a new start...
this is my cry for help.
youll never see me like this again.
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[Tuesday
01 01 08 | 02:14am] |
worst night of my life
peace the fuck out 2007 you blew my asshole.
2008 you better not suck...
nothing really planned, cause my resolutions never keep.
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| still. |
[Friday
12 28 07 | 10:27pm] |
Ok.
so its after the holidays, ill follow suit and talk about what an amazing christmas i had, and such an awesome time I had with my family..
only ill spare you a cute story and tell you the truth
by far the WORST holiday season.
it starts with my car.
found out its going to cost 1200 to get it fixed. NOT WORTH It. so my next option save and find a newer used car.
but along with that comes, waiting a few months and saving..only i cant save with a roomate like chuck and rent to pay, and a cat to get vaccinated.
All in all, things couldnt have came at a worse time.
I have no idea what to do with my car, I cant spend ANY of the money I got for xmas becuase I need a car. I don t know I am going to be getting to my shows next month, or class for that matter.
I fucking hate my job and in about a month, I might be taking gus and bill to small claims court, because they claimed i would get a bonus if sales went up, if we passed our corporate visit, and if things went well in the store, over the following months I was assistant manager,
well.
in november alone, sales went up 6%
we passed our corporate visit..why? becuase i stayed 2 hours after close the night before it to make sure the store looked great.
i work my ASSSSSS off in that place, and dont even get a thanks.
so i'm checking the contract i signed, for verification, and if he does nothing about it, i'm quitting and taking them to court.
Let see, I have to take feivel to the vet, he needs 2 more shots, which are going to cost me a few hundred..i cant afford., let alone how would i get up there, with a cat?
I want to move out..now
my roomate is never home, so its like i live here a lone, which is bullshit.
fuck
im so depressed. this sucks.
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[Thursday
12 20 07 | 12:20am] |
ok, so ive been at an all time low as of late.
last tuesday, i was going to jeffs house after work around 1am, and it started to rain..well i should say.ice. well i was in the fast lane and wanted to get over one, and ended up spinning out, losing control of my car and hitting the median.
my car is fucked. im fine.
as of lately I dont have a car, making things such a burden on me, I have to take the bus to and from work, I have to rely on people to come pick me up, and occisionally get stranded in places cause a ride doesnt follow through.
I am BROKE. like thats an understatement, I owe so much fucking money to EVERYONE and their moms right now, and of course, living with chuck, I am constantly reminded of how much money I owe him, and when he comes home with BAGS of clothes from his work, it makes me think." seriously"
I fucking hate michigan SO MUCH i would give my life to start over, find new friends, and forget my past here and make one in New York or chicago.
I fucking HATE my job, I deal with these kids I call my co-workers who act like they are 5 bitching about hours left and right, and expect me to fix it cause im the manager. I dont know what to do, but Im gonna be quitting soon.
Ive just been so miserable, I miss being able to go out with my friends on the weekends, and have money to spend foolishly on clothes and shoes and shit....I havent went shopping for myself in about 6 months.
I havent even bought my xmas gifts yet, not my moms, not dads, brothers sisters, bf's it fucking blows and i feel like a lowlife right now.
I need help.
I need money!
I need a car.
I need a hug
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| moving on |
[Monday
11 12 07 | 02:00am] |
I have an audition tomorrow at 8.
wish me broken legs.
its for :caught in the net by ray cooney
a british farce about a dad who has two wifes on two different sides of London.
a son from one wife and a daughter from the other.
The son and daughter meet on the internet, and want to meet due to their common traits.
(last name, dad being a taxi driver, etc.)
sounds like fun, and I need something to get my mind off Rimers of Eldritch =/
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| life |
[Friday
11 09 07 | 12:58pm] |
i havent updated this thing since like..august or september, so i feel like its time for an update on my life.
I am probably in the worst mood right now, for so many reasons.
First and foremost, i am so broke. I dont get it. I work my ass off, im required to work 25 hours a week, and they have only been giving me 19-25. Im the fucking assistant manager, and I cant even get the hours I ask for. Ever since Brian left the company I have been acting like fucking superman in that store, trying to save everyones ass, keeping the morale up, keeping the store clean, and keeping the store running, it seems every day I work there, the more I hate it. I get paid 12.02 an hour, to basically do nothing, but it seems like Im doing so fucking much, with little to no appreciation. Wheres my 90 day bonus? wheres my high paychecks, wheres my hours?
what the fuck
I have 12.18 in the bank right now, and eric the new store manager though it would be a BRILLIANT idea to tell ethe owners that we need to start paying employees bi weekly, of course when i have no money, they do this. I have 12 dollars to last me until next monday, im just hoping i get money for my birthday
speaking of my birthday, its merely 6 days away, and Im not even anticipating it, I havent been in a good mood for 4 days now, and I dont see me being in any better of a mood. I just need to find something thats going to make me happy.
This past monday was auditions for the heck rabis and the rimers of eldritch. as many of you know, I wanted the character Robert, basically me in a nutshell, and I WORKED MY ASS off, read the play, did character analysis, understoood it, and nailed my audition, the next day, I find out, theres no call backs being held for rimers of eldritch, and that the director was casting from auditions. I feel like I didnt even get a chance, when I found out Mikel Allen is Robert. It makes me so sick thinking about it, I literally had it going for me, and now my dreams, and hopes were shattered, and Im left here with nothing. Not a damn thing, I turned down a professional PAID position to be Bobby in American Buffalo at the Abreact to be in Rimers, and NOTHING, I cant even be in that now. FUCKING STUPID!
I just want to curl up in a ball and cry.
not to mention Im not doing so hot in any of my classes except russian. this year just sucks. I remember in 2006 when ang and i were plannign on moving in together. It was amazing, I was having so much fun, and we kept saying 2007 was the year...my ass its the year. Im fucking over 2007, liked NOTHING about it, and Im just...Im just done...
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[Thursday
08 16 07 | 04:46am] |
yesss.
i might actually have money again soon.
This Friday's paycheck: 88 dollars before taxes.
Monday's Paycheck: 347 before taxes.
MOnday after that's paycheck: 471.86 before taxes.
Monday after that.: 480.82 before taxes.
Friday following that. 92 before taxes =)))))
YESS..
time to pay the bills. buy nice things, and save up for Moscow!
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[Wednesday
08 08 07 | 09:39pm] |
ok so as you may not know.
im staying at cold stone. I really needed toget out of there, but Ive been promoted to Assistant Manager, making at least 13 an hour.
meaning ill be getting rougly 430 a week. or so.
in the time ive been at work, bored, at home, or whatever, ive been thinking of my future a lot. and what i want to accomplish, today, tomorrow, next month, next year, and in 40 years.
First and foremost,
I want to start getting to bed earlier.
I want to start drawing more, I used to be good.
I want to pay my roomate back for all I owe him.
I want my paycheck to be pretty good next week.
I want fall semester to go by fast, and get to the end of wintersemester so i can graduate already.
I want to save my money. get my car fixed. get some new clothes, and save up.
I AM going to the following places..in the next 5 years.
MOSCOW, RUSSIA--- Next summer
NYC,NY----ASAP
LISBOA, PORTUGAL!---hopefully next year...
I need to just be rich.
time to eat.
random i know
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[Saturday
07 28 07 | 02:18am] |
| [ |
music |
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back to earth, goldfrapp |
] |
i like when things start going right..or have the potential to get even better.
im trying to bring things from my past into my now.
i hope things work out for the best, becuase that would make me a much happier boy.
i got called back for a part in American Buffalo at the Zeitgeist performance space, and it makes me happy, becuase I shouldnt have gotten called back because I didnt put everything into my audition, but I am going to make it worth the time at the Call backs, I want this part so bad, and i hope i get called back for Equus too, cause that would be the highlight of my career.
I made out of my Government class with a B, 2 days before that I was beyond failing. so that made me extremely happy, and got a 98 on my final.
I got my new job at club monaco at somerset. Im pretty damn excited for that too, I have my orientation tomorrow afternoon, and then I have to go to the Ringwald where I am stage managing a selection of student written and produced shows, you should come check it out..commment and ill give u some info.
besides that, things are slowly getting better, now if only i could get a few more things going right, and i will be happy lil camper for the time being.
i miss my friends.
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| guh |
[Saturday
07 14 07 | 06:48pm] |
i need a new better paying job
this 8 dollars and hour shit just aint cutting it anymore.
its nice but whatevr..i mean i dont get enough hours, im sick of working down there.
I want to work at diesel so bad. but that wont happen (if at all ) until the somerset store opens. which who knows when that s gonna work.
So im pretty mcuh loving chicago.
It just seems like when I have fun, I forget where I am, and lose track of time, it sucks cause im coming home in like 2.5 days, i dont want to...at all. I just wanna start all over.
New job, new friends, new city, new everything..but again..back to my first statement, the whole job things..
does any one know of a job that will pay me good in the detroit area. (nothing too far.) if so, please hook a brother up.!
going downtown for a few, navy pier later i think
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| hi. |
[Thursday
07 12 07 | 03:22am] |
hi.
ill be here if you need me.
k thanks..PEACE THE FUCK OUT DETROIT
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[Wednesday
07 11 07 | 04:26pm] |
hi im leaving for chicago.
be back monday!
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| wow |
[Sunday
07 08 07 | 05:41am] |
ok first off, no one uses this anymore.
live journal was the shit before myspace joined the internet boat.
and now facebook and myspace is ruining the social lives of all.
It is 5:42am right now, i completely fucked my sleeping schedule up.
Jourdan, Phil, Chuck and I went to Canada friday night and got pretty much shit faced and ran a 180 dollar tab at ONE bar. we strolled in the door at like.4ish. Finally went to bed. I got up at 9:30 and drove to work. Worked 10-6. When i got off, i was fine, until I got in my car, and literally almost fell asleep on my 4 minute drive home.
I got home, and layed down cause my feet were killing me, within minutes I was Out. I woke up at 11pm. and ive been laying in my bed for about 6 hours now. Ive been so bored of the internet.
So, a lot of random shits been going on over here
got an iphone. I LOVE IT!
Been working my ass off. (for nothing)
I owe a billion and half dollars to my roomate.
I need to get my car fixed....again.. (frankly im just sick of this shit.)
I got my tattoo, and already want more.
So I've decided once I get home from Chicago next monday, Im literally leaving my credit cards at home when I go out and to work. Becuase If I have it, I use it, and before I know it, Im gonna be fucked ovver and and have to move home again.
I've had so much on my mind lately. I really just want to let it all out somehow. I wanna start drawing, I think I might do that on the way to chicago or something, because Im sick of just being a lazy ass and sleeping or sitting at home all day.
I miss my social life.
I miss my old friends.
I miss high school.
I just miss being innocent, young, and careless.
Now im worrying, in debt, have every worry in the world about money. and scared to just...live.
To those who might just be glancing over this, say hi. I miss hearing from old friends. If I talk to you regularly, make a date for us to hang out. I know Im busy, but chances are, I miss you, and I want to be close again.
The end.
Its now 6am. I really should try and go to bed, becuase I dont wanna screw up my day tomorrow either.
YESSSSS RYAN COMES HOME IN A FEW HOURS!!!!
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[Sunday
06 17 07 | 04:27am] |
im lonely.
moved into my new apartment this past monday, and its nothing short of amazing.
still working on my summer classes.
audition for american buffalo and equus at the end of this month, kinda nervous and excited.
i hope i get a part..i want to act again soon.
as of late i pretty much dont have any friends.
my phone rings only when rj and my mom or my work calls me kinda depressing
as of late, just pretty much work, school, moving, sleeping, eating..
no time for fun.
frankie moved to chicago
and im stuck here with chuck, im ready to up and leave this place.
random but short..its geting late.
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[Friday
06 08 07 | 01:20am] |
ok so heres the deal.
quick question:
does any one know of a CHEEEEEAPPP tattoo place (or friend who is safe and clean) that would be willing to ink me.
its gonna be somewhat small.
if not..any piercers? i want to get something done soon.
let me know the details.
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| theres a fly in the room |
[Saturday
05 26 07 | 10:51pm] |
hello journal land.
just felt like updating the good ole lj since its been quite a while.
theres nothing all too exciting going on in my life, since my last update.
jeff and i broke up.
things werent really working out for us, and I decided to call it quits before both of us got hurt even more.
The days are slowly going by til I move out of the Renaud. Im actually kinda sad, becuase I actually like the people that live over here. And ill also be sad to leave the location considering its right across the street from old main, but seriously Ive had enough with the cockroaches, the broken appliances, the messy kitchen, the disgusting warped floors. im done with it.
Chuck and I found an apartment on Kirby on the corner of Beaubien and Kirby (right behind CCS (2 blocks north of campus, 3 blocks east.)
Its fully carpeted, great location, a little cheaper (but more expensive for us, since its only the 2 of us).
But we are definately looking into hooking this apartment up (like..ikea catalog hook up)im looking into getting some of scotts artwork set up in the apt, and perhaps some of mine. I think its a neat touch.
Taking 2 summer classes right now, American Goverment and Intro to Ethics (gotta love the Gen Eds.) Im super excited becuase I realized today that I might graduate on time. THANK GOD! I cant believe its already my junior year in college. CRRRAAZZZY how time flies, when u get old. Sooner than I know it, Im going to be living in NYC in a loft apartment, with my 23904809320 cats and my server job (a boy can dream) hahah. No but on the for real, Im seriously really excited for this next coming semester, Its nice to be well established in the program I am in, and I really hope that takes me far in life.
Went to tech fest. I dont really remember it being that lame, I remember when Ashley Nalepa and I went and we passed out programs, and called eachtother every 2 seconds cause we lost eachother, I had a lot of fun. But this time it was just particularly lame.
Speaking of old times, and old friends.
I really miss my old group of friends, The ones I had in 7-12th grade. It sucks that by me moving to Big Rapids for school, I lost touch with everyone.
Today I saw ashley bainbridge for the first time since..god....uhh.september...october? we used to practically live with eachtoerh, and now its months since I see my friends.
Its thundering outside, theres a fly in my room, the refridgerator's hum seems unnaturally loud today, and my roomates are out having fun, and im home alone. LAMMEEEE!!!
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| ok..now.. |
[Tuesday
04 24 07 | 06:24pm] |
Ok now that I have a day off, I can officially put my mind to this.
First and foremost.
This semester is FIIIIIINALLY coming to an abrupt end. Needless to say, Im sooo thankful its done. I am not doing well at all this semester. At the beginning of the semester, I crammed myself with classes, In hopes to FINALLY audition for the BFA...ehhh not so much. It turns out, the secretary of the department told me that I was allowed to take Theatre history 2 before theatre history 1 cause they werent anything to do with the other, well at my assessment she lied to me and told me that she did NOT say i could take the class I am taking becuase Im not a sophomore in the department. But whatever the bitch lied to me.
So that put a damper on things, now not only am I still behind and wont be caught up until winter semester 2008, I dont get to interview for the BFA, nor do I get to be at the level im supposed to be.
NExt on the list.
My apartment
Many of you know I moved in here on January 2nd, 2007. Since then we have been diligently paying our rent on time, and being good tenants, well the past 4 months frank hasnt been paying rent, becuase when his original roomate megan lived here with just him and her, they payed 300 something each, then jen moved in, making rent payments go down, well franks mom wasnt informed of the changes, and continued to pay 100 dollars more than he was supposed to for about 10 months. needless to say our landlord has no record of our payments, and has been sending us eviction notices, saying if we dont pay 1235 dollars we are evicted. Which is utter bullshit, so we might be taking Hope, Inc. to court.
On top of that, we have no hot water in our kitchen sink, the floors are bowed at the walls due to the radiator under us warping our floors, 2 light fixtures are broken ,we still have cloth wiring, (totally not safe) our bathroom has been undergoing repairs, they patched under our sink with plaster, and decided to pour the unused plaster in our bathtub... and down the drain, tell me plaster is safe for pipes... well how do they go about doing this you ask. Our building manager robin, is the only one with keys to each apt in the complex. our WHIIIITE TRASH building maintenance men, and woman decided they are going to take robins keys and make copies of all of them so they could get into the apts. and fix shit whenever they want. Well common sense would be to call the tenants and ask when a good time for them to fix shit. But no, they come in at random hours of the day, make a mess, half ass shit and then leave. I find this so unprofessional.
So needless to say, Chuck and I are moving to a WAYYY nicer apartment on Kirby and Beaubien.
Im sick of people bitching they never get to see me anymore, becuase im too busy. but they never seem to care enough to call enough in advance and make plans ( i can ask for days off you know).
Im way proud of ang btw, for finally getting recorded, they sound great ang. best of luck with the rest. (you need to stay over more often BT dubs.)
the end..for now.
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electrocutions's journal